The Road to Savannah: Working on a mystery, going wherever it leads

I’ve run more this year than I ever have.  Not just in any year, probably all the years combined.  And maybe double that.  But the weird thing, it doesn’t seem that weird.  I honestly wonder what I did with my life when I wasn’t running through it. How on earth did I pick my next trip, if it wasn’t because of the next race I’d be running. What a sad little life I must have had!

People ask me all the time why I run so much, or when I’ll take a break, or how do I get up every Saturday or squeeze in evening runs when I’m busy. The truth is, there are some hardcore, dedicated, super runners out there – and I’m just not one of them. I do run. I do run a long run every Saturday. Except for the Saturdays that I don’t. I run hill runs and I run tempo runs, except for when I don’t. Sometimes I opt to stay in. Sometimes I opt for 3 miles instead of 5, or 7 instead of 9, or 14 instead of 18. But, more often than not, lately, I get out there.

Along the way this year I’ve learned some things about myself and running. I am not a short distance runner. I hate three miles. Sometimes I hate five. Sometimes it takes me 40 minutes to really find my groove. Sometimes I don’t find it. But I will never settle in and feel satisfied or happy with a short run. Those will leave me feeling uncoordinated, tired, and on the edge of inury. I am at my best when I’m out there for the long haul.  Knowing this has made those short runs easier to handle.

I’ve learned that I need to drink more water. As I type this my water bottle sits by my desk, half full from the only time I filled it today – so I’m going to get up, finish it on the way to refill it.  I need to drink more water. A lot more. Always.

I also need to eat better. When I have a week where I’ve had time to carefully think out my meals, or say, have meals, my runs are so much better. Same with sleep.  When I’ve slept, my runs are better. Understanding these things has made the bad runs easier. I am not a bad runner – I am a bad water-drinker, eater, and sleeper. Somehow, I have an easier time accepting those flaws in myself.

As with other aspects of my life, there is a race-day routine, and I find comfort in it. I wake up at least an hour before I have to leave the house. There are a variety of preventative type meds that are consumed, water, dog walk (if I have her with me), peanut butter, banana. My favorite socks (and I only have one pair of these), and I generally have a preference for running shirt. I have my water belt, and tiny bottles of frozen water. I have my jelly beans, and shot blocks, and power bar chews. I have my phone, and my headphones, and my hat (that’s new this year, but it stays). I affix my running number to my right upper leg. If I have a shoe tag, that goes on the left shoe. I have three bobby pins. But, what I’ve learned this year is, I don’t need three bobby pins, or my favorite socks, or that running shirt. I remember a run in Austin where I got down to Town Lake for 8 miles, and realized I didn’t have my watch. And I went home. It wasn’t an excuse, really, I really did not think I could run without my watch. And while, I’d still prefer to know my times and paces, I think I could stick it out without much panic. I could manage with a new pair of socks, or luke warm water. I could do this having been up for only 30 minutes prior to leaving, or with chunky peanut butter and not creamy. (I’m not sure I could do it with my race number pinned anywhere but my right leg, although I’m now looking at pictures where my race number was pinned to my shirt and I don’t seem to be hyperventilating, so maybe even that’s possible). This year, I’ve learned to be more flexible. And more forgiving. Each day is different, each run is different, and I’m not out here to rule the world. I just like running.

So, in my mind, Savannah is like a final exam of sorts. Where I can prove to myself that I am a better person. And I can get out of my head and enjoy a run. My body can take my mind along for a ride, and run a marathon that even a turtle would be proud to be a part of. And, for the love of god, if I rip open a chocolate milk container and spill it all over myself after crossing the finish line, this time I will simply ask for another instead of bursting in to tears!

Bring it, Savannah! No one’s nervous!

The Road to Savannah: It was the turtle who won that race...

I’m not going to be winning any races any time soon. My July race was a small half marathon in Easton, MA. There were 300 runners in the half, and I finished faster than 3% of those people.  Yes, that puts me in the bottom 10 people. And, ostensibly, I’m ok with that. I still ran it. Someone has to be last, one day it might be me. Do I love being at the back of the pack, no! Does being at the back of the pack offer me some anxiety that front-of-the-pack runners don’t have to deal with, yes! Do I routinely have to fight with the notion that some people will think I'm not as dedicated as fast people, yes! But, it’s a spot I’ve learned to accept.

I don’t run to be fast. I tried to get fast(er) once. And I did. And in the process I broke down and was sidelined for the better portion of a year. On the heels of that, I realize that I value the ability to run races more than I value any hope of “winning”.  I love doing this, and I’d like to keep doing it for a long time. So, I don’t push to reach speed standards anymore.

I found this t-shirt the other day, and I love it
(not just because my dog is named Turtle!)

I often find myself apologizing for my (lack of) speed, or trying to make excuses for it. I'm always putting a caveat on the "Oh, so you're a runner" comments with an "I'm not that good" response. I hide my run/walk type of running style like a dark secret, I stare off to the side when people say with disdain "I saw this one guy walking..." and I cower in the corner when people talk about how they’d rather die than take more than 4 hours to finish a marathon. I shift my eyes downward when crossing paths with someone who is fast, dreading making eye contact for fear that I will see them looking at me and wondering why I’m even running.  But, then I remind myself that I'm out here, running, just like those fast guys. We all do our own thing to get across the finish line and get back out there the next day. We have our routines, our preferences, and they are our own. I don't run races for anyone else, and I don’t run to be fast.  

I run so I can unplug. I run so I can disconnect. I run because I am pushing myself to my own limits, not someone else’s. I run because it slows my brain down, which is often moving too fast and doing too many things. I run because it makes me feel strong, and determined. I run because it opens my eyes. I run because it makes me a kinder person. I run because it makes my head clearer. I run because it chases away the trials and tribulations of the day. I run because it connects me to the places I live. I run because runners are some of the most wonderful people I’ve met. I run because I am the absolute best version of myself when I am running. When I remember these things, the shame of running slow falls away.

I may not be fast, but I have become better. What I’ve learned through this year of running is to stop letting my mind control my body, and start letting my body control my mind. My mind tells me to stop some days before I even get going, but my feet just scream louder for my running shoes. My mind tells me I’m tired and can’t go any further, while my legs are singing look at us, we are going. My body is in control, shutting my mind down when it wants to be scared. I notice that it does not take the mental preparation for me to run 8, 9, 10, 15 miles. I was so sure my mind would talk me out of my very first 18-mile run that I hopped on a plane and ran that run in Boston (8 miles with NDH and then a pass off for the final 10 miles with CNHB and tiny Ebster!) 18-miles is not the same mental hurdle that it was. (22, 26, they still are a mental challenge), but I can see how far I’ve come since that first day I trained for a timed mile.

I've noticed this same effect on my personality off the road. Instead of reacting to things like an emotional illogical hot-mess, I'm slower, more thoughtful and hopefully a bit more purposeful. I find myself to be a bit more understanding of others, and their opinions/needs/ideas. I give myself time to process, and thoroughly think things through. I care less about the expected outcome, or preferred procedure, and I make choices based on what works for me. I've noticed that things which would have been a "hot-button" for me a year ago can slide by almost unnoticed these days. I have been banking a lot of energy that I used to spend worrying about endless things. It's a welcome, new-found freedom.

I joined a new running group, which I absolutely love, and have been running in the back of that pack. There are plenty of people who are much more talented at running than I am. But I won’t lie and say I didn’t love some of the facial expressions when early in the training season I told them that this would be my third marathon. And that I’ve run a half marathon every month so far this year. Yep, me, that girl huffing it out in back. What of it? We had a happy hour a few weeks back, combined with the half marathon training group. I spent some time talking to the half marathoners, and I remembered a similar day in Austin when I chatted with a marathon runner. I was in absolute awe of her, I could not comprehend what type of guts it must have taken her to set out one day and say, I’m going to train for 26.2 miles. I was in awe that she wasn’t already crying because she was about to go out on an 18 mile run, and what if she died out there! I was nearly crying for her.  I saw a similar look of disbelief on these half marathoners faces, as I told them of my first, second, and now third time training for a full marathon. I think the biggest disbelief was my own. There are many people who are much more accomplished at this than I am, but, it turns out along the way – I’ve become a runner. And I'm trying to stop making excuses, or placing a caveat on that. I am just a runner, it doesn’t matter my speed.

The Road to Savannah: In the Beginning

I remember the first time I joined a running group, and that first day we ran a timed mile. This was to figure out our paces, place us in groups and ultimately help to track our progress. I remember training for that day. For a mile. I remember being scared of it, what if I can’t run a mile? Will they kick me out? This first run with that running group sticks out in my mind to perfectly portray the anxiety and doubt and fear that I had about running. I trained for a mile, because I was unsure if I could finish it.

I don’t know when I started running, really.  It was in Texas for sure.  And I would run sporadically, randomly, without any knowledge or purpose or expectations. In writing this post I saw an email I sent to a friend in September of 2007, where I said I had “just started running distances” and went on to further say that I could “probably finish 3 miles, but not 5!” This was where my distance running started, my dreaded 3-mile slump. What little I knew about myself and running back then!

Early one morning, in February 2008, I went downtown to watch RO’D running in the Austin half. And it was amazing. The crowds, the runners, the strength and determination. I went home and I ran a few miles, totally inspired. And then, I forgot how it had felt that race day, and went back to my half-assed uninformed occasional running. It was sometime in 2008 that Ryan and I decided we were going to run the San Antonio rock and roll half marathon in November of that year. I downloaded a training plan, and I stared at numbers of 6, 7, 8, 10 miles. Holy holy holy crap.  And I put that training plan away. And I found a running group.

What’s so special about Savannah, and why is the road leading there?  It’s true, nothing really.  It’s not my last race of the year, it’s not my first marathon, it’s not a particularly challenging race or significant date, it hasn’t been a life goal of mine. Truth is, I signed up for the marathon in Savannah one night after having one too many Resurrections at a Brewer’s Art happy hour. I signed up for Savannah a mere week after telling someone in an email that I “may never run another marathon, that may not be my distance.”  Savannah will be my second full marathon this year, and only my third ever. That girl who started distance running with 3 but not 5 miles, she never wanted to run a marathon. She was content with the challenge that 13.1 miles posed, and she was content doing that only once in a while. She never wanted more. Until, the day she wondered if she could.

Cue the push to sign up for the Baltimore Marathon with NDH and VK for October 2011. At that point I had finished 3 (4?) half marathons, 4 10Ks, a few team triathlons, a mud run, and one Ragnar series relay race. I signed up for my first marathon with an overwhelming sense of dread and fear, and curiosity – could I even do this? I ran my first marathon to see if I could. And by some accounts, I did run it. It was slow, and painful. My goal was to finish, and I did. I felt proud and happy. But I didn’t necessarily feel I had done “my best” – there were many times I felt close to giving up, and worse there were times that I felt giving up would have been ok. I (eventually) wondered if I could do it better. Cue signing up for the Country Music Marathon in 2013 with NDH. Nashville was going to be different.  I was still scared, but of different things. I could finish – but could I finish well? Unfortunately, the ending of my Nashville race still plagues me to this day. I’m not talking about the time (I rarely do). But, I was so beat down by the end of that race. Not only had I lost confidence in my ability to run, I had convinced myself I was bad at it, by mile 26 I had convinced myself I was bad at most things in life. I still feel embarrassed when I think about sitting on the sidewalk alone, chocolate milk container spilled all over me, cold beer in my water-wrinkled hands, shivering from the cold that comes from being soggy wet for 7 hours, crying. Crying because my brain had told me that I had done so badly, and I believed it. I hate my brain for ruining that day for me. The truth about Nashville is I ran a 20-minute PR marathon through such torrential downpours that most people I know (save for the thousands of people who ran it) probably wouldn’t have started.  Moreover, I was on pace for an even bigger PR for much of that race. It was a proud accomplishment, but there I was crying over spilt milk and bruised egos.

I signed up for my third marathon, not to see if I could do it, and not to see if I could do it better, but I signed up for my 3^rd marathon to be better. Turns out, that girl who started running at 3 but not 5 miles, she’s learned something about herself and running. She’s a little bit stronger, even on her weakest days.

*If anything, this song reminds me of myself more than any one specific person, as I am often my own worst enemy - particularly the part about being tired of spinning my wheels. Particularly that part!

13 medals in '13: A half time report

It's been a busy 2013 so far, and as we come up on the half-way mark (which is also my birthday) I'd like to take a moment to look back at the first 6 months, and perhaps peek ahead to the next 6.

I'm not quite sure when the dream was born, nor am I sure when it became a reality, but here's the best account I can give for what has come to be my year of running. Admittedly, I wasn't terribly sad to ring out 2012 this past January. When laid out end-to-end 2012 probably had just as many ups and downs as every other year, but it somehow uncovered numerous questions and yet provided no answers. I'm fairly certain that my inability to run (without pain, if at all) from February until about September only made these problems worse.  By the end of the year, when I knew I was able to get back in it, races began popping up on my 2013 calendar.  First, Key West Ragnar (January), and then the Country Music Marathon in Nashville (April), and then the Austin Half Marathon (February).  At this point a seed was planted, find a March race and you'll have done four races in four months.  And from there, a running explosion!  I wasn't terribly vocal about it until about May, but by then I was so far in it that my goals were well known - a race a month, and 13 medals in '13.

For the numerical breakdown: As of June 2013, I have run 8 races, 6 distances with PRs at 4 (10K, half marathon, full marathon, and 14.6-miler*), run in 7 cities (Miami/Key West, Austin, DC, Nashville, Fredericksburg and Sterling, VA), and with the help of my amazing friends and family I was able to raise $1,187 for the Huntington's Disease Society of America - bringing my to-date total to $3,111 raised. Beyond that I've been able to see, run with, and be cheered along by numerous friends and family members. I've also had my fair share of "firsts" this year.  I ran my first ever trail race, a half marathon that really turned out to be 14.6 miles. My parents were able to watch me race for the first time. I ran my first race totally alone - showed up alone, started alone, ended alone, left alone.  I ran a half marathon with a two week period of no running prior to it, and did not feel (too) ill-prepared.

My 2013 races thus far have been: Key West Ragnar, beginning in Miami ending in Key West (January), Austin Half Marathon (February), DC Rock 'n Roll Half Marathon (March), Sole of the City 10K in Baltimore (April), Country Music Marathon in Nashville (April), The Color Run in Baltimore (May), the Historic Half Marathon in Fredericksburg, VA (May), and the North Face Endurance Challenge Trail Half Marathon in Sterling, VA (June).

More than just racking up the medals, each month I'm given a reminder of how truly fortunate I am. There are friends who watch my dog and feed my cat while I'm gone, and friends who offer up their homes (even when they can't be home themselves) and at times giving up their bed for the couch. Friends and family have gotten on planes and driven distances to cheer me on.  There are texts, and phone calls, and emails wishing me luck, cheering me along as I go, and asking for recaps when it's over.  Every month.  By any angle I look at it, normal people should be tired of hearing about this, they should roll their eyes when I bring up my latest training run or my next race.  But, my friends are amazing, and instead of tiring of the mundane details, they ask for them! Some of them are crazy enough to jump in and run with me when I need even more support than normal. There is no way I could keep doing this without all of the support I am fortunate to have! Each medal is a reminder of those friends, near and far. They remind me of eating dinner in a gas station and spewing luggage along side many Florida roads, of early jogs around Town Lake and post-race tacos at Wahoos, of mimosas at 18th Amendment, of country line dancing in our brand new boots and tackling the staircase in the Opryland Hotel, of the Luke Bryan concert...  These 13 medals come with some of my favorite memories ever!  I'd be remiss not to mention that these races have afforded me the ability to run with some of my favorite running buddies, most notably (and probably the only one to be reading this) is NDH. Thanks for being an inspiration, cheerleader, and race companion. I'll run a race with you anytime, Brub!

This year has also taught me to trust my own strengths.  Everyones strengths are different, and I have my own set.  They do not include speed.  They do include perseverance.  Each month I can feel easily that I have grown stronger, I recover faster, I ache less, my mind doesn't win over my body as often as it used to. And, when I'm not running I have developed this sense of calm that I never really thought existed. I have found a way to quiet the anxiety that my life otherwise throws at me. These are the reasons I keep going.

It seems almost apropos that the tragic events of the Boston Marathon happened during this, my year of running. I think any account of my year that didn't touch on this somewhat would be misleading. I have trouble saying that this day affected me, I know personally so many people who were more directly affected and in much more real and terrible ways than I was - I was not there, I did not see or hear or feel it, I haven't even made it to Boston since it happened.  But, this was my turf, my home town (almost too much my home town**).  I arrived to work on Marathon Monday wearing my 2012 BAA5K shirt, and my 2012 BAA Marathon jacket that I received for being an Elite Water Stop volunteer that year. I set up my laptop, and much to the annoyance of my co-workers I was giving a running stride-by-stride of what the lead pack in both the men's and women's races were doing. Once they finished, I was refreshing the tracking pages of my several friends who were running, and getting text updates from NDH awaiting their arrival at the finish line. I will claim to be one of the first people to know about the bombs going off, as I will never forget the few text messages that came in talking about explosions and police craziness, just before the seeming FOREVER radio silence. In retrospect, it was about 20-30 minutes where I was unsure just how involved NDH was in the mess and trying desperately not to think the worst. I knew he was near something terrible, but it was taking too long for the news to fill in the details, and the cell signals were not working to get the very important "I am safe and getting out of here" message out to anyone. It was a small drop of time in the grand scheme, but it's 20-30 minutes I don't need to re-live!  And then, along with the rest of the running community, I watched the horror unfold. Just when I could finally peel myself away from the news, reports of the city on lockdown as a manhunt for the bombers began.  A manhunt that would end a mere half of a mile from my Watertown apartment. The entire experience was surreal, and difficult to digest. But, I've never been more proud to be a part of the running community. Runner's everywhere united in a way I can barely describe, but it was immensely heart-warming, hugely cathartic, and has forever changed the way I approach running. Instead of feeling scared and alone, I felt like part of something nearly unbreakable. As tragic and terrible as the events of April 15th 2013 in Copley Square were, the outcome reaffirmed my faith in humanity. Which, is something we all need from time to time.  From this, we are all a little bit stronger.

If I look through the past 6 months, and remember the unanswered questions that 2012 dug up...I'm amazed to see that they're being dealt with! Most notably, I have a great new job opportunity that I will start at the end of July. Last year left me wondering where I was headed, and while I am still kind of wandering through it all, I feel much more comfortable that I'm moving in the right direction! I'm not saying I found the answers out on a run, but I know I found the ability to make things happen for myself on these runs. And I definitely found the ability to trust my instincts!  As much as I can witness my physical strength increasing, there has been a much needed amount of personal growth as well.

As for the next 6 months, I've got my July race and my November race already scheduled. And a September and December in mind. August and October are question marks, and I'm holding off on making commitments until I know all of my options. But, I can honestly say, this has been one of the best years so far, and I can not wait for the next 6 months.

I have plenty of pump-me-up music on my running play list, but this song has become somewhat of a mantra for me on some runs. It calms me down, it slows my brain, it reminds me to get out of my head, and for the first half of 2013 at least, it is my running theme song.



*The North Face Endurance Challenge ended up clocking in at 14.6 miles instead of the expected 13.1, this posed some additional challenges as that last 1.5 miles did not come especially easy or without confusion. North Face has more than made up for it by providing some additional coupons for their gear and this fantastically amazing sticker!

**Just to drive the point home, and explain why it was so surreal to see CNN, MSNBC, and every other news channel camped out at the end of my old street, and the SWAT on top of the convenience store where my roommate and I bought our beer, this is a google map from our old house to where Dzhokhar Tsarnaev was found.

Ragnar DC 2012

Our team, Lickity Split, has a start time of 11am on Friday September 21, 2012 for the Ragnar Relay from Cumberland, MD to National Harbor in DC. Here is one account of our adventures!
(For a review, here is the account of my first Ragnar in 2010 from CNHB!)

Thursday 9/20/2012:
4:30pm - I've left work on a mission to get the few things I need. The list is made!

6:30pm - The last of my things have been acquired, a wicked sweet sleeping bag and my own headlamp to protect me in the woods at night. I've also put in new batteries, so no one will be blamed for me being stranded in the dark! (thank you!)

7:15pm - off to kickball! All my clothes are packed in ziplocs, by outfit and clothing type. Toiletries and running accessories too!

9:45pm - Dinner, packing, organizing. Hydrating. Thanks to LD for talking me through my food supplies. We've got peanut butter for days!

10:52pm - An email from NDH that simply says "you are awesome". That's all I needed to hear. Until tomorrow!

Friday 9/21/2012:
6:52am - Am awake. I'm surprised by the lack of panic.  This is going to be fun!  Time to tackle this morning's to-do list: shower, dishes, trash, bake muffins, pack snack cooler, and the elusive playlist!

7:43am - Cooler of snacks is packed. Gatorade, coke zero, chocolate slim fast, bagels, peanut butter, apples, bananas, and power bars. Seems like way too much food but you never know!

8:08am - AHHHHH!  iTunes has died and apparently "can't save my library file for unknown reasons" in the midst of making a new playlist.  NOOOOOO!  PANIC!

8:27am - iTunes is back and running, phone is charged and playlist has synced (save for 8 songs that won't go, but I can't care about that now.

8:35am - BANANA CHOCOLATE CHIP MUFFINS REQUIRE EGGS (or applesauce).  PANIC!  I don't have either

8:47am - oil it is, muffins better bake quickly.

9:38am - muffins are done. Bags are packed. Am restless and pacing. Let's do this already. Still 20 minutes until my ride comes.

9:54am - Call from C.J. And we're off to Frederick MD to meet up with van 2!

10:24am - we've arrived in Frederick at a house full of bags, kids, dogs, and decidedly no serial killers! Ty tells us our start time has been pushed up, and the other van was off at 10:30am

11:10am - they tell me the other last minute runner they picked up is "Ronnie the runner" (and he has a website ronnietherunner.com). He's an ultra marathoner who is apparently pretty energetic. I'm hoping they're not disappointed with acquiring slowpoke me!!

11:22am - we get word that the first runner exchange went off without a hitch. Runner 2 is off!

12:22pm - Our van is loaded and we're off. For food!

2:34pm - We've arrived at the first major exchange and headed to safety check-in.

3:13pm - no service at this exchange, but we've heard word that the last runner in van 1 is out and on the way. 30 minutes and our van takes over.

3:15pm - All tatted up!

3:47pm - CJ, our first runner is off!

5:05pm - our second exchange is over. And I'm getting nervous! My bib is on my vest ready for a "night time" leg.

5:36pm - In the middle of a leg called "what the hill?!" As far as I can tell its the only leg with a name. Rightly so, holy hill - but Erik is rockin' it!

5:37pm - my phone needs some serious charging, particularly if I'm going to use it for tunes and gps. I'm determined not to let this team down and get us behind our projected time.

6:00pm - third hand off, Patty's off on her 4.5 mile run. Which means I'm next. And nervous!

6:12pm - I'm taped up, laced up, vested, head lamped and butt lamped. And ready to (wait a bit more before its my turn to) run!

6:34pm - headed to the chute, see you on the flip side.

7:41pm - and my first leg is done!! In at a solid 11 min pace. First four were 10:15 splits even. Then I lost it a bit. Great run along the trail from Hancock MD. Ended in the dark, course lined by glow sticks and Holocene in my ears. Perfect!

8:33pm - changed into my sweats and awaiting Ty to finish up and do the last hand off to Raleigh!

8:57pm - left our last exchange, Raleigh is on his own for this leg again - the last three have been non support legs along the rail trail. On our way to the next major exchange, to meet up with van 1 and finish our first set of runs!

8:59pm - thanks nanio for your endomondo recommendation. Here's the break down of that first run. What the heck is a 7:34min max speed doing in there. Must be why I lost my pace at the end. Good news, my legs are attached!!

9:29pm - we've arrived at the next major exchange and are waiting for Raleigh so we can call it a night! We've been tagged for the second time. This teams van says "everyday I'm shufflin'!" I love their magnets too!

9:51pm - Best exchange ever! We're here at the second major exchange. Which means van 2, anchored by Raleigh, had to pass off to van 1, lead off by Taryn! In keeping with team tradition (save for me) Raleigh is also a sandbagger and got in about 11 minutes early. The chute volunteers yelled out "272!" but we were not quite ready, Taryn was in the bathroom. Raleigh was coming in fast, so Ty yells out "slow up Ral, like A LOT!" as van 1 members are telling "TARYN, FASTER!" Taryn comes running up a hill from the port-a-potties, jumps the fence at the chute, and makes it just seconds after Raleigh arrived for the hand-off! Taryn drops her bag of stuff in the chute and is off! Nice work, Lickity Split!

9:56pm - We're off now. For pancakes I do believe!

10:25pm - Pancakes!

11;32pm - we're headed to exchange 18, where we will hopefully catch some sleep. Van 1 is doing great, we are now 51 minutes ahead of our projected time - so maybe only a little sleep. I've taken over the role of navigator for now. My first question upon getting into the front seat "um, guys, where are we going?" A+ for effort!!

11:35pm - In Hagerstown, MD. 77 miles from Bawlmer.

Saturday, September 22nd:
12:22am - we're at the major exchange for some sleep. We've parked near a small playground with most of the van in sleeping bags under the slide. Raleigh and I have opted to sleep in the van (despite my wicked awesome sleeping bag)! G'night y'all.

12:51am - Not asleep. In fact, very awake as Patty is back at the van, knocking on the window to make sure we have her phone number so she's not lost.

1:23am - Not asleep.

1:59am - Not asleep.

2:05am - We're up and getting ready for our on time! Seems everyone else has slept a bit.  First song on the radio when we turn the van on says "I'm wide awake!" Raleigh and I disagree.

2:43am - CJs off, and we're back to the van. Ty has resumed driving and I'm back as navigator. Second legs for van 2!

2:54am - driving through Middleton MD. It looks like it would be a cute town, were it light outside.

3:20am - No one tell my mom, but I just changed my complete outfit in a scary dark corner of a shopping center, behind the dumpster. Exchange 1 over. Erik's out for his second leg!

3:32am - breakfast of champions: coke zero and a bagel.

3:43am - my peoples back home are all asleep and no ones around to hear me be nervous. Erik's leg is almost over and Patty's up next. And I don't feel ready.

3:45am - bang, crash. "what was that?" "I think that was my Gatorade!" CJs Gatorade just rolled off the roof of the van as we pulled to a stop sign. Nice driving Ty, we went about 5 minutes without it moving up there!

4:25am - Patty's in the midst of her second leg, 6.7 miles. CJ says it was this leg last year where he nearly kicked a possum while running. Awesome! Wildlife!

4:26am - I'm ready. I think. Maybe. Probably.

4:32am - I'm now wondering if I should switch the outfit I am wearing for this next leg. It dark and chilly. I should save this pair of shorts an tank top for my daytime run. Crap. Is there time to change?!

4:44am - Yes, time to change. On the side of the road. Now I'm wearing capris and will save my shorts for the last leg! We've also just seen Patty, who is half way done!

5:08am - NDH is up and checks in with me just as I'm heading to the chute. I decide I wish I'd had time to use the bathroom, and am now unsure how this will go!

5:13am - official hand off Patty to me!

5:50am - Holy Fuck Yes! (sorry Mon!) but that was the most fun run ever. That's why I did this this weekend. 3.6 miles, me, a head lamp, and a road between corn fields and farms. I passed 7 people, had a negative split (for the first bit), swallowed a massively huge bug, and finished well under my projected pace.

6:07am - after a bit of banter about what the appropriate thing to say when passing someone in a race, N is off to sleep and I'm going to try and do the same. Ty's in the midst of his 9+ mile run, then Raleigh has the same.

6:45am - I have been asleep in the middle seat when the van stops suddenly. I open my eyes to see a runner hunched over and CJ is out to help. At first I think it's Ty, but quickly realize its not and we're taking him in. To my seat. Quick maneuver to the back seat and we've got the downed runner. We are very close to the exchange where we drop him to his team and move along to meet up with Ty for the last exchange of this round.

6:59am - And Raleigh is off.

7:04am - And now I'm driving....

7:39am - hi!

7:43am - Ty hands water off to Raleigh 6 miles into his 9+ run.

Ty's got excellent flag skills, and Raleigh is almost too fast to catch on film. Almost time for breakfast, guys!

9:58am - Nap Time! (oh ya, somewhere in here we ate breakfast at panera.)

12:44pm - after a team nap, some food, water, stretching, and the like van 2 is out for the last 6 runs of this thing! Most people have short runs, CJ leads us off with 2.2. We've left him early so that poor Erik can get ready for his non-short 6.9 no van support leg!

1:14pm - lots of confusion at the last exchange. Teams without bracelets, runners over-running their runs, runners under running. But not us, CJ was in in record time and Erik's off on his last one!

2:09pm - Erik's done, it looked rough - 6.9 miles in the blazing sun, uphill. "A hill that got so steep it had to end in stairs!" Patty's off on her last 2.7, and I'm up next. I'm awfully stiff right now, with some interesting low back pain. Hopefully I can pull out this last 4.4 without too much trouble. I'm back in a trail for this one - along the Potomac! See you when I'm done.

2:19pm - the van has taken a wrong turn, we're running the risk of being late to meet Patty. Not making me panic at all!

2:25pm - we've found our exchange point and see Patty coming in strong. Ty barely has enough time to stop the car; I'm out, carrying my belt, and running into the chute in the same direction as Patty, confusing everyone.

2:26pm - off to a discombobulated start I am thankful for the don't walk sign right away at a huge busy intersection so I can start endomondo, iTunes, interval timer and situate my belt.

2:35pm - this is really the most beautiful run of the whole race!

2:43pm - the trail narrows and a sign indicates that bikers should get off and walk. The biker in front of me tries, but crashes into the trail railing, falling off her bike and basically flipping over the railing into the street. It was a little ordeal to help clear that up before I was back on my way.

2:55pm - it is hot. My skin feels like its on fire, my water is gone. I am barely moving. But, I'm running along the Potomac, I can see the Jefferson memorial, the planes are landing at National directly in front of me. I try to ignore that I am dying!

2:56pm - a fork in the trail and no sign. I choose incorrectly. I'm back on the right course a few minutes later.

3:22pm - I finally hand of to Ty. It was a rough rough leg, however pretty! It ended in a little park where people were taking wedding pictures!

4:07pm - at National Harbor! Off to find Raleigh, van 1, and finish this up right! More from the beer tent

4:25pm - Raleigh finishes his leg, with a "Fist Bump Yeah!" from the whole team as we crossed the finish line, got our medals, and a few team photos. I think this makes our time about 29 hours and 55 minutes! Nice work Lickity Split!!

7:04pm - Monica, Ronnie and I are headed from Frederick to Hagerstown to drop Ronnie off when we realize one of the car magnets is missing. On the way out to I70, I spied it in the road face down. We stopped quick to rescue it, one small crack but perhaps salvageable!!  This finally makes me feel like I've contributed something useful to the team that let me join them the day before Ragnar!  Thanks Lickity Split, it was great fun!

Ragnar was a Norse god

A few years back I ran the Ragnar New England with NDH and several of our friends.  It was one of the most awesome running experiences ever, and I've been dying to do one ever since.  On Tuesday night, I was given an idea.  Someone made a post in a facebook group of mine, asking for an extra runner to fill in. I jumped at that shot, and told her I could do it.  And then I waited.  And waited for her to respond.  As I waited, the idea got bigger and bigger, and I really wanted to do this.  It seemed like such a random adventure - oh, right, I should mention the race was 3 days away! It seemed like the type of adventure I could really get on board with right now. So, I found the Ragnar DC facebook page, and located a different team in need of runners, and as of late last night I was their latest teammate!

As much as I loved New England Ragnar, it was a bit of a situation.  I was co-captain (NDH, we did do awesome), but it was stressful.  I was very concerned about logistics, and everyone being happy, healthy, safe (also, on time, in the right spot, following the rules).  Add to this, my own nerves about the actual running, some extensive sleep deprivation, and the fact that our team nearly lost a runner on the second to last leg of the race, and then entered Gillette Stadium dead fucking last. Let's just say, there were tears.

What I'm most excited for about this Ragnar is....none of that.  I'm not in charge.  There will not be exhaustion-exaggerated-personal-drama.  There will just be running, through what hopes to be some ridiculously beautiful scenery.  And hopefully a group of new friends when I'm done.  We're basically BFFs already, as all day they've been referring to me as SuperStar.  It's like they know me!

I'll be trying to live-blog/update as I go, so please check-in, it'll be nice to hear some friendly encouragement.

So here goes something.  Tomorrow, Ragnar number 2.  

She smiles like she's so tough

When I returned from Tennessee, I kept up the daily runs.  Almost without thinking about it.  It was the day of my first kickball game (two weeks ago) that I realized how much I'd kept up with them.  I arrived at kickball a little early, and decided to go on a short run to kill the time.  Maybe 2 miles was what I fit in.  After that, I put it together that I had run 9 of the last 10 days.  Have I mentioned it feels really good to be back!

I've made a new training schedule for myself.  Written it out on a calendar.  It combines three different schedules, the first 8 weeks are a slightly modified method for getting faster for a 10K, the next 16 weeks are a slightly modified half marathon training schedule (modified only to increase the distance enough to be into a full marathon training schedule in time) and the last 8 weeks are the full marathon training.  What I like about this schedule is the abundance of time. This is really giving me about 22 weeks to train for a full marathon, after some speed work. My long runs before the half hit up to 15 or 16 miles I think.  I'm excited to exceed race distance, and make that half marathon seem like an easy day!  My normal training schedules set up race day to be a huge reach, this seems like maybe the pressure will be off.  It also seems like there's some flexibility for missed runs, missed distances, and just the little hiccups that we all know affect me much more than some other runners we know.

The basic layout of the schedule is pretty easy to follow too. For the first bit it looks like this:
Monday  - Cross-train day, right now I've been doing boot camp at the gym and loving it
Tuesday - speed day, and I've been heading to the work treadmill for that
Wednesday - start with early morning yoga (a well needed stretch after Tuesday speed), followed by a pretty easy low mileage day later on
Thursday - tempo run
Friday - OFF (yippee)
Saturday - long run
Sunday - easy slow 30 minute recovery run

Things switch up a bit when the "speed" work is done, and I move more into tackling distances.  Then the easy low mileage run shifts to Tuesday, the tempo run is Wednesday, and Thursday is another low mileage easy run.  At this point too, the long runs start getting into the distances that have begun to scare me again.  I'm good under 7.  10, eeeek!

I've stuck to it pretty well so far. With a wee hiccup last weekend.

During my speed workout this week, this song came into my play list.  I remember the first time this song resonated with me back when I was living in Boston.  Mostly because of some drama going on with friends at work and how I actually wanted to show up hiding under a paper bag.  I feel like that sometimes, but this song reminds me that actually, I'm pretty strong.  I don't need to hide, I boxed my shadow and won!
(this video isn't the greatest, but apparently there is no video for the song, and it was the most not terrible)